It's Time to Get Up

My two nephews and my son are sprawled downstairs on the living room floor, exhausted from a, most likely, late night of laughter and fun. My girls are both in their respective rooms--one sleeping and one awake as Savana gets up before the break of dawn on a daily basis. As I look out the window, I can see splashes of orange and red as the leaves are turning at a brisk rate.

So much beauty in my life. So much to relish.

This week has flown by at an alarming rate. I'm not sure what happened but time absolutely got away from me as each day merged into the other without boundary. That seems to be happening more and more these days.

This week I've thought a lot about dreams--what are my dreams? What do I want in my life? If I could have anything at all, what would it be?

Oh, the possibilities!

I would own a comfortable-sized home on an acre or two of land that had a shop for Roy to play in and a view that took my breath away when I sat on the back porch with my cup of chai and a book that spelled home.

I would have a new wardrobe.

I would be active in the community in some fashion--help with a nonprofit organization or be part of a local reading circle...

I would plan more getaways--just 3 days or so--to escape the normalcy of life and see different places, have time to just breathe the air of a different setting.

I would go home to Oklahoma more to see my parents (all 3 of them) who have my heart and whom I adore in ways they could never fully know.

I would go hiking more up in the mountains so that I could actually watch the sun set--or the sun rise.

I would go on more picnics because picnics are lighthearted and fun and, somehow, make me feel free.

I would explore more. We live in an explorer's haven--so much to see and do within a short drive from here.

My life coach told me this week that I am just too damned logical. I have a difficult time getting out of my head and dreaming.

Her words took me back. I am? Her words made me cock my head a bit. They stung actually--just a bit. But as I took a step back, I realized how spot-on she was. I am too logical. I spend way too much time killing dreams with practicality.

Jace is only 12 and he needs his mother--I don't have time to be involved or gone chasing my own dreams in the evenings. I need to be with my son...We need to save money! We shouldn't spend it frivolously on trips or clothes--I have plenty of clothes! Hiking takes gas--gas is so expensive! We need to save save save. 

And the practicality continues.

I work with a guy named Keenan Lake. Most likely that name means nothing to most people in my circle, but to some people, that name means everything. I met Keenan when I first started working for the county but never really knew who he was until earlier this past week. Keenan is one of those guys who never meets a stranger and from the start, he joked with me about my driving (as he thinks I almost killed him in the parking lot but whatever because I didn't...I swear I saw him despite what he says) and tells me I need to do some work and learn how to type and that sort of thing. But for whatever reason, he sat down on the corner of my desk and just started chatting with me about life this past week. Turns out, Keenan's dad was a Harlem Globetrotter who taught his son to dream and to dream big. Keenan grew up on the basketball court and played college ball and then pro ball for awhile overseas. When he came back to Asheville, he got a job working for the county and one day, a lady walked by and said, "Hey, Keenan. Would you like to be a social worker?" He said, "Never thought about that but I suppose I could give it a try." And so, this boy with a degree in sports medicine became a social worker and saw the need for male role models in the lives of boys ages 12-19. And so? He started a nonprofit, built it up year by year until now he has a full-fledged organization, complete with a newsletter and activities and volunteers that is making an overwhelming difference in the lives of underprivileged kids. He even wrote a book.

Keenan knows how to dream.

When I look back at my list, it makes me laugh. Most everything is manageable. Most everything there is an opportunity that I could have if I would merely get up.

And so, this week? I'm going to build. I'm going to make plans.

I'm going to get up.